In the International Classification of Diseases (ICD-10) this concept appears in the list of personality and behavioural disorders – next to such well-known problems as passive-aggressive, psychoneurotic, and narcissistic disorders. But there is no infantilism in the board book of psychotherapists, the current edition of the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM-5).
The reason is that there are no specific recognised symptoms by which infantile personality disorder can be unequivocally diagnosed. Research is still underway. But it is still possible to recognise a person with this disorder. Lifehacker found out how.
What is infantilism
In a general sense, infantilism means immaturity. This concept is used not only in psychology. For example, there is physiological infantilism – a condition in which an adult seriously lags behind in physical development: has a small height, childish features. Or sexual infantilism – immaturity of sexual organs.
Psychological immaturity means that a person is not ready to function in the adult world. His behavioural patterns, habits, lifestyle do not correspond to those of normal individuals.
Here we need to make a digression about what normality is. Societies are different. Somewhere, for example, it is customary for a child to leave his father’s house immediately after adulthood, and somewhere it is considered quite normal when a son or daughter lives with his parents all his life and brings his own family under a common roof.
When we talk about infantilism, we mean that an adult looks immature, not independent, a “child” in the context of the society of which he or she is a part.
However, living with parents, while peers have long since become autonomous, or, for example, obeying mum at 45 – this is not yet a diagnosis. On infantile personality disorder psychologists say when a person is inflexible, maladaptive. He can not reorganise, “grow up”, even when his childish habits threaten the collapse of the family, career.
This is a dangerous disadvantage (“He behaves like a helpless child or frivolous teenager, it is bad for everyone, including him”) and is the main criterion of mental disorder.
How to recognise infantilism
The symptoms of psychological immaturity are extensive and varied. They often overlap with signs of other disorders – narcissistic, passive-aggressive, eccentric. But there are some key points. Infantilism can be suspected if a person exhibits several of these features at once.
A tendency to irresponsible behaviour
Run across the road at a red light, lose an important document, derail the deadline, for years to earn the minimum wage. With such actions, a person actually shifts responsibility from himself to the surrounding “adults”. It is they who have to take care of his safety, restore the papers, do something about the deadlines of the task and pay for groceries and utilities.
Mood swings
In people with infantilism, they have a sharper amplitude than usual. And a good mood often takes the form of childishness, foolishness.
Impulsiveness
A person is proud of the fact that at any moment can sharply go somewhere. Or, for example, proudly and independently send someone.
Inability to set goals and make long-term plans
In simple words – a person lives without thinking about tomorrow.
Inability to manage money
They either completely descend on endless desires, or accumulate under the pillow for a rainy day.
A tendency to engage in risky behaviour
Examples of this behaviour include a love of gambling, extreme sports, dangerous driving, addiction to drugs, promiscuous sexual activity.
Avoiding embarrassing situations
Call a government organisation to resolve an issue. Go to a parent-teacher conference at school. Talk to a neighbour who leaves rubbish bags in the stairwell. All of these turn out to be impossible tasks for a person, which he is happy to shift to others.
A sense of superiority over others
“Everyone around you is a fool.”
Exaggerated demands on loved ones
A person always knows what a partner, children or other family members should do. For example, from a three-year-old child, he may require mandatory cleaning of the flat in the evenings, and not for the sake of cleanliness, but only as part of the educational process. And from the spouse – a daily hot dinner of a couple of dishes. At the same time, the requirements for themselves, on the contrary, reduced: suffering from infantilism owes no one anything.
Ingratitude to others
Even if they obey the exaggerated demands.
The desire to devalue loved ones
In this case, people with infantile disorder emphasise their own importance.
